You are driving on the freeway and your car brakes feel weird so you go to a mechanic and they say the car is fine there is nothing to worry about. When you drive on the freeway again you notice they are not working normally so you return to the same mechanic who again tells you that the car is fine and there is nothing to worry about. You start to wonder if maybe it is you that is the problem since you have been told the car is fine but you do not like the feeling of the brakes not working properly so you go to a different mechanic. The new mechanic tells you this is a common problem for this type of vehicle when it drives at high speeds. You can now digest that response and understand why you felt like there was something wrong with the car. This is how Karen Young compares the feeling a child has when experiencing anxiety. The part of your brain that causes the feeling of anxiety is called the amygdala. The amygdala’s job is to protect your body from any sort of threat you may face. The pre-frontal cortex is the part of the brain that solves problems by allowing you to analyze and respond appropriately. When the pre-frontal cortex is temporarily not working your brain acts on instinct. When a child is feeling anxious the pre-frontal cortex will not understand when being told “there is nothing to worry about” because the amygdala is triggered for a reason. This phrase will actually trigger the amygdala to release stress hormones because the threat becomes worse when the adult does not understand or notice what is going on. What you should do if a child feels anxious is be there to comfort them and let them know that you understand and that their feelings are acceptable. To help the child calm down you can teach them breathing techniques and mindfulness. Mindfulness is a very good way to calm anxiety down because it activates the pre-frontal cortex and teaches it to work with the amygdala. Three calming techniques Young mentions are:

  1. Hot cocoa breathing: imagine you have a cup of hot cocoa in your hands and breathe in the smell of the warm chocolate drink for three seconds then blow on it to cool it down for three seconds holding your breath for a second in between.
  2. Figure eight breathing: Draw a figure eight on part of your body that feels comfortable (the adult can draw on the child if the child would like). Breathe in for three counts as you draw the top of the eight and breathe out for three seconds as you draw the bottom of the eight holding your breath for one second in between.
  3. Grounding: Name five things you see, four things you hear, three things you feel, two things you smell and one thing you taste (can be in any order).

Source: Young, Karen. (n.d.). Anxiety in Children: A Metaphor to Put You In Their Shoes (And Right Beside Them). Retrieved from https://www.heysigmund.com/anxiety-children-metaphor-put-shoes-right-beside/?fbclid=IwAR1u1oyoNG0tRobALqOoXonwzP9a3h9SPckNMYK_BkKol3pFsCmISylyghA